About a month ago, I went down to the local Macy's to upscale my wardrobe a bit. I needed a few pieces of "resort casual" clothing to enter the restaurants for dinner on the Alaska cruise I was about to take.
A salesperson asked, as they always do, whether I had a Macy's card that I would like to use. I mentioned that I did have an account but that I didn't have my card with me. No problem, he responds, then can just look up the account. Ten minutes later I get handed the telephone and asked to answer a few multiple choice questions about my life. At the conclusion of this whole mess, the salesperson remarks that, oh, well it looks like you had an account after all. Well, duh.
I return home from the cruise, expecting the bill to be waiting for me. It isn't. I wait some more. Still nothing. I call up the customer service number on the back of my credit card. The automated system tells me that my account does in fact have a zero balance. This is weird.
I decide to head back to the store in person to straighten things out. The sign over the customer service desk says that payments can be made here. Perfect.
I ask the cashier for the balance so that I can pay off the bill. She scans the barcode on my receipt and the terminal brings up a mimum payment of $6. That's great, but how much do I owe to pay off the account? Well, that requires a call to customer service.
She calls customer service, gives the rep my account number and then hands the phone to me. I try to explain my situation, but the voice on the other side of the phone tells me that I need to be transfered to customer service.
So finally I get transfered to the person who ought to be able to help me. What's my account number, he asks. I scratch my head for a bit, as the only thing on this slip of paper I have is a barcode. So I get the cashier to scan the code again so I can give yet another person my account information.
After all of this, I finally get the amount I must pay off. I ask why I wasn't able to get this information from the automated system I called in the morning. Well, it turns out that this is a dual purpose card. The VISA part did have a zero balance while the Macy's part did have a balnance.
Whatever. So why hadn't I received a bill? He tells me that's strange because it was mailed two weeks ago. I asked the rep to confirm my address. As a started rolling off the street address, he stops me. That's not the address they have on file. Turns out the helpful salesperson must have "updated" my address to my previous address.
A few minutes later things finally look like they are starting to come together. I've got the payoff amount and my address is now updated. Then, there's an expression of concern on the other side. Looks like my payment is due in three days, which is not really enough time to mail a check.
No problem, I reply. I'm at a store now and I can make may payment directly. I'm just glad I caught it in time to avoid a late fee. I finish up the call going over everything we had done. So, I will recieve a statement at my correct address next month? Well, actually no, not if you pay off the balance. We don't send a statement if there's no balance. Not even to confirm receipt of payment, I asked surprised. No, he assures me, if you don't get a statement then that means you are paid in full. Well, I counter, I didn't get a statement this month and that's because you had the wrong address.
It's fifteen minutes later and I am finally ready to pay. Unfortunately, they only take cash or checks. Checks? Who takes checks? I can't even use checks at my friend's store, and I've known him for over ten years.
Luckily, I'm just across the street from an ATM. It takes me a few more minutes to run over and pull out some cash. And with that, the long saga is finally over.
